" I thought about it, and unfortunately her statement wasn't too far from the truth. To quickly read the spoken and unspoken clues of what a woman was looking for in a man, and then give her the perception I was that guy.
If you back me up a few years — sans wife, kids, dogs, published book on relationships, 1.5 million readers and fans following my relationship advice on Facebook — I was a chronic womanizer; a past she knows about, but never experienced personally. In effect, to become so alluring that she would willingly give herself over, thinking that having sex was her idea.
are, or you do know but don’t seem deterred, or they’ve been manipulative with their compliments to sell you their behaviour – “You’re so kind, generous, understanding, and supportive..” or even “I’m so glad you’re not like everyone else making demands on me..” – which you lap up and see as a compliment while they’re slipping their shady behaviour under the radar, they will gradually become increasing complacent and even careless about your feelings and your relationship.
They’ll also feel free to disappoint you if they know that you’re If someone believes that you’re so enamoured with them that you won’t leave, create conflict or consequences, or at least tell them to jog on (and mean it) when they try to push the boundaries, not only will they relax, but they just won’t in and given another chance, when really they should be getting the heave ho or at the very least, an increase in boundary security.
People, rightly or wrongly, get a sense of how they can treat you and what they can get away with via their own actions and your boundaries which you demonstrate with your own actions and words.
Even if you got what you think that they give everyone else, they’d still disappoint you on a deeper level.
The greatest amount of disappointment actually comes from continuing to hold out hope after someone has shown and told you who they are.
Or just ditching you every time a better offer comes up.
– Claiming that the reason why they treat you as they do is because, for instance, you’re the ‘strong’ one in the family or don’t need as much as the others, or some other weird reason to justify why they treat you differently.